Category Archives: Growth

On Being Your True Self

Standard

One of my favorite parts of yoga is that through breath and movement we find our true self while on the mat.  We find that person deep inside ourselves, the person we are at our core without any influence from the outside world, or others.  Sometimes you find it while you are moving through a vigorous sequence and other times it comes when you are resting in savasana.  To me, it’s a moment of complete acceptance and complete release.  A moment in time where there is no judgement from the world or ourselves.    Yoga teachers often encourage you to bring that version of yourself into your life off the mat, or maybe you just connect back to that feeling in a moment of stress or uneasiness.

I really love this philosophy and that feeling of being completely accepted is incredible.  I try to bring this version of myself into my everyday life and try to live as my authentic self.  It’s not always easy…actually it’s never easy.  It’s hard to rise above those who judge you for whatever reason it may be.  It’s hard to make choices that will uphold this and allow me to truly be myself.  Sometimes it means I have to let certain things go, because I know it’s just not who I am.  Occasionally it means I have to make the choice to end a relationship that doesn’t support me and that’s never easy.  And sometimes it means I need to tune out the noise and advice of the world, and do things my way.  And admittedly, my way isn’t always the easiest or best way but it is what works for me and lets me be this person I love.

Source: facebook.com via Whitney on Pinterest

Being your true self is not easy.  BUT it is absolutely worth it.  It’s worth living with less to have more.  I know I make less money to do what I love, and that I often surround myself with fewer friends but when I look at it I see a world filled with a career and job I love and some incredible friends and family who support me unconditionally.  My job, yoga and my family all allow me to be myself…goofy and silly but determined to accomplish my goals.  Sometimes I feel judged, open and ripped raw by the challenges of the world but I’m able to react as myself and know I have a support system who loves me and isn’t judgmental.   It makes this life worth living and for that I’m grateful.

If you ask me, life is too short to try to be someone else.  It’s too short to try to be the person everyone else wants you to be.  It’s so much easier to just be who you are.  Being who you are and surrounding yourself with family, friends, coworkers and life that supports that makes life happier, more fun and much more fulfilling!

“Do It Anyway” by Mother Teresa

People are often unreasonable,
illogical and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind,
people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful,
you will win some false friends and true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank,
people may cheat you;
Be honest anyway.

What you spend years building,
someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness,
they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today,
people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have,
and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

Are you living a life where you are true to yourself?

On Teaching My Own Class!

Standard

Wednesday morning I taught my very own yoga class.  Next week I’ll be teaching it again, and the week after that, and after that and well you get the idea.  It’s my class to teach each week!

I was pretty nervous about teaching on Wednesday.  It was the first time I’ve taught since teacher training ended in January and only the second time I’ve taught an hour and 15 minute class. I was afraid no one would come, that I’d mess up, that it wouldn’t be my best class and so much more.

Truth is I did mess up and it wasn’t my best class.  People did come, in fact two of the girls from the Athleta Burlington store where I am sponsored athlete came to surprise me! And you know what? I loved every second of teaching, learned so much and I can’t wait to teach again.

The Athleta girls and I after my first class!

The Athleta girls and I after my first class!

563219_657243546717_1779768901_n

The Athleta girls and I after my first class!

I thought I’d share some of my thoughts and reflections…

  • I did mess up, but you know what? Only I knew that.  I completely forgot Sun C’s.  Literally, could not tell them what to do.  I fumbled my way through a combo Sun A/Sun C type salutation, brought them back to the front of the mat and just did a few more Sun A’s.  No one knew, and they all still raved about my class at the end. And I remembered Sun C’s clear as day about half way through the practice.  Nervous, much?
  • I struggled to mirror…you know when I say right but do left?!  I can barely keep my lefts and rights straight at 5pm let alone at 6:30am.  I know I did it wrong, and even did a little dance shifting between right and left legs when their backs were to me.  Nobody knew.  I did learn that I need to always wear a ring only on one hand to help me identify left and right quickly.  And I learned another good trick to help me mirror…put an R in the left hand corner of my mat and a L in the right hand corner of my mat.  LOVE that.
  • I learned that planning a class when you know you have week after week ahead of you is so fun! You can pick a theme and run with it. And if you are like me think of a million good ideas while you are writing the sequence, you can just jot them down and use them the next week.
  • Planing a playlist is just as fun…I made a great playlist and then just changed it up slightly for next week! And to think, I’ll actually get to use all those awesome yoga songs at some point?! So fun!
  • I realized that next week, I want to find a reading to use in savasana because I just LOVE when the reading speaks to me and I want my students to experience that.
  • It feels incredible to lead a class through a practice you love, to share poses you love and sequences you love and see your students enjoy it as much as you do.
  • And lastly, it’s just down right cool to finally get paid to do something you love! Sorry…I couldn’t resist.  It was the first time I made money as a yoga teacher!

The biggest take away for me really was to get this first class under my belt.  I proved to myself that I can be a great yoga teacher and that I do know so much and it has a way of flowing out when I teach.  Wednesday’s class gave me confidence, which is exactly what I needed as yoga teacher.

Hopefully I’ll see you next week at Roots Yoga in Burlington, MA for Yogathlete with ME from 6:30 to 7:45am!

Roots Class

What was your first class as an instructor like? What is your favorite part of a yoga class?

How Teacher Training Changed My Body

Standard

One of the questions I’m often asked is, “how has teacher training changed your body?”.  I definitely feel as if my body has changed.  I often thought I understood my body as an athlete prior to teacher training, I could push through pain and exhaustion and learned again and again how to improve my form or balance to become a better athlete.  Teacher training though taught me that I had so much more to learn.  Now I feel as if I am able to control my body and utilize the strength in my muscles to get in to deeper backbends and more challenging arm balances.  While  I still have my fears (um hello headstands and handstand) I’m slowly overcoming them and starting to trust in my body and strength more.

My running has improved thanks to yoga too.  My hips feel more open and my core stronger so each step feels more powerful.  I don’t feel as if I struggle with the pain in my hips as much as I once did and I definitely no longer struggle with ITBS.  I feel more balanced when I’m out running.  I haven’t had to wear my brace to help with runners knee in almost a year and I’ve never once thought I needed it!

My posture is much different.  I stand taller with my shoulders back and open more, my hips are more open on my front side and my tail is tucked.  It feels so good and natural.  As a taller woman, I’m 5’9″ I was always slouching and rolling my shoulders forward in an effort to look shorter.  It would make my back and neck hurt and was often really uncomfortable.  Today, I feel so much better and more confident standing taller.

I could talk all day about the subtle changes in my body but I think it’s best if I just show you.  Back in August we had to choose 3 challenges poses.  David photographed us in each one and then in January we came back and photographed them again so we could see how much we’ve changed.

Challenge pose #1

I choose wheel for my first challenge pose.  I really wanted to go from wheel to standing but knew I had a long way to go.

Wheel Pose August 2012

Wheel Pose August 2012

Wheel Pose January 2013

Wheel Pose January 2013

You can see I have really deepened my backbend.  I’ve worked to open my shoulders so I can straighten my arms completely and I’ve been working to open the front of my hips and contracting my glutes so I can continue to walk my feet closer to my hands.  With the support of a teacher to help guide me I can come up to standing and drop back to wheel again.  I’m still deepening my backbend to be able to come into this on my own.  I’m impressed with how dar I’ve come!

Challenge Pose #2

Handstand was my second challenge pose.  I’ve always wanted to get into this pose but struggled with getting upside down.

Handstand August 2012

Handstand August 2012

Handstand January 2013

Handstand January 2013

Back in August I couldn’t even kick up to a wall.  Now I am able to kick up to the wall and better understand how to control my body, which muscles to contract, how to hold my arms and shoulders to support my weight and I am slowly starting to get over my fear of being upside down.  I’ll be honest, I HATE kicking up to a wall but I’m learning and perhaps someday I’ll get into handstand without the wall.

Challenge Post #3

Forearm stand.  I always think people who can do this in the middle of a yoga class look ridiculously awesome and I wanted to be one of them.   Forearm stand scares me less than handstand but I’m still learning.

Forearm Stand August 2012

Forearm Stand August 2012

Forearm Stand January 2013

Forearm Stand January 2013

For me, what is most noticeable in this pose is the approach.  You can tell from the photos I’ve learned to engage my entire body in this pose and the chaos from the first pose is not visible in the second pose.  When I look at these two photos I see calmness and strength in the second photo and chaos and lack of trust in the first photo.  To me, that transformation is huge!

Like many things in life, I’ve learned we have all our strengths.  For me, I really wanted my strength to be going upside down or backbends but in the last 6 months I’ve learned that my strength is really in arm balances! I have the strength and flexibility to twist up my body and lift it off the ground and have so much fun doing it!  Arm balances are definitely my favorite now.  Next week I’m taking a workshop on arm balances and hope to learn some new balances and share photos!

Side Crow Pose

Side Crow Pose

Yoga is a journey and I’m impressed with how far I’ve come in the last 6 months.  I can only imagine how my practice will evolve and change in the future!

How has your changed your body?  What are your strengths and weaknesses?  Do you like backbends, stands or arm balances best?

Yoga Teacher Training…The Final Weekend!

Standard

Last week I was counting down the days until the weekend.  I was so excited about this final weekend of teacher training!  I knew it would be celebratory and fun and most importantly the beginning of a new chapter.

Saturday when we arrived to the studio we were all buzzing, smiling and excited.  We started by assisting Jojo’s 9am class which was packed thanks to the new year and a group of Lululemon employees.  Adjusting classes is a unique way to be intimately involved with the students and their practice.  I love going around, helping students deepen poses, align better and relax into those juicy poses like reclined twist, janushirasana and pigeon.  Assisting students in savasana is always my favorite.  I love when teachers assist me, it helps me to relax and release any final tensions.  I try to give each student plenty of time and focus when adjusting in this pose so they too can enjoy savasana.

After Jojo’s class we had circle time.  Today was a little bit different. We each took a piece of paper, wrote our name on the top and passed it to the person to our right.  Each of us wrote one sentence on the paper.  The idea was to write down our thoughts, and impressions of the person on the paper.  We continued to pass the papers around, writing our thoughts and sharing what we admired in that person.  In the end we received our papers back.  They were filled with 13 notes from our fellow trainees with kind words, thoughts and opinions…words to lift us up and inspire us.  We then wrote our own words in response to those negative statements we have heard from those closest to us our whole lives. Then we read the notes from our peers and David asked us to write an affirmation about the person we have become…

I have the courage and presence of mind to say what others are thinking.  The intimacy and knowledge of my own practice take me to a place where I can teach and inspire others.

We broke for lunch and started to prepare for the afternoon community class.  It was truly a team effort to make the class a success. Those who were teaching walked through their class with the microphone and those how weren’t teaching prepared the studio.  That meant we were on vacuum, bathroom and prop duty…making sure everything was neat and clean and the studio was looking it’s best for those coming for the class.  While some of the trainees greeted people and helped them find what they’d need for a successful class I worked the front desk, signing people in and collecting waivers.  Once everyone arrived and was settled I headed in to take the class.

My Teacher Training Group!

My Teacher Training Group!

My fellow trainees literally rocked their class.  It felt like one giant party.  Everyone was great spirits and all smiles, the playlist was awesome and the class was challenging.  The room was packed with everyone’s friends and family there to support them.

After the class we broke for the day, my group quickly met to rehearse our class that we’d be teaching on Sunday.  I headed out to meet Michael.  We were staying in the city to go to dinner and see Savion Glover at the Boston Opera House.  Michael had gotten me tickets for Christmas and I was really excited for the night!  I showered and got ready for the night and wore a sparkly black dress.  Right before we headed out I quickly went to the bathroom.  As I was standing outside the door putting my jacket on to go I heard the sound of water…lots of water.  I turned the light on and saw the toilet over flowing.  Rapidly over flowing.  I quickly yelled for Michael and grabbed a towel and threw it on the floor.  I couldn’t help but laugh at the situation.  All dressed up for a night on the town dealing with an over flowing toilet.  But somehow it didn’t ruin my night.  It made it just that much better.

Sunday morning we took David’s public class.  As he said, it was his final gift to us.  David was in a great mood, full of smiles and laughter and had an awesome playlist to remind us the journey we’d been on.  We all laughed and enjoyed the class.  It felt good to sweat and flow next to my fellow teacher trainees.

Adjusting the Public Class

Adjusting the Public Class

We closed out the morning by having one final circle.  It was an opportunity to say whatever we wanted to the group.  We each went around sharing our story of the journey, and thanking each other.  For me it all seemed so surreal, to be sitting there on the final day of teacher training.  It was something I dreamed about and talked about for so long. We reminisced back to-day 1 when we had to hug everyone…and most of us agreed we had the same thought…hell no.  As for me, it was an opportunity to thank my teacher trainees and David for showing me that I actually don’t have my shit together, that I have walls just like everyone else and that I don’t need to be perfect all the time and really that’s the only way to live.  I told them the story about the overflowing toilet.  For me to laugh in that moment and know that I would still have a great night is truly a testament for how far I’ve come.  There were a lot of tears of happiness, joy and love.  In some way we all fell in love with each other throughout this journey.  And much like we started the journey we closed it by hugging each and everyone, but this time there was love and smiles shared with each hug.

Teacher Trainees

We broke for lunch and then prepared for another community class.  Sunday was my day to teach and I was so excited.  We mocked through our class with the microphone and set the mats up so we could demo as necessary.  Michael came to support me and soon enough the room was full.  We had a packed house! The class went so well.  I couldn’t have been happier! It was amazing to see more than 50 people follow our directions!

Teacher Trainees

After the class, everyone participated in our graduation ceremony! David showed a slide show with photos from our photo shoot.  They handed out our certificates and roses and before we knew it the day had come to an end.  It’s official…I’m a certified yoga instructor!

It's Official!

It’s Official!

On Feeling Accomplished

Standard

It is no secret that I love goals and milestones to work towards.  I’ve learned over the years that it’s really just better for everyone if I think about life in small chunks.  One accomplishment at a time, one step at a time.  Sometimes the smallest things in life can leave me feeling accomplished and I love that!

We are in the height of recruitment for our summer season at Team In Training.  I’m managing two teams and working with our corporate program so it’s definitely busy.  I love what I’m doing and feel like I’ve found my stride.  I’ve finally adjusted to the new schedule and have a good handle on how to manage all my responsibilities.  As I was driving home last night I was reflecting on how nervous I was about this busy month and how pleasantly surprised I am about how well it’s going.   It left me feeling accomplished.

Even though it’s only been a week I’m feeling so good about the fact that I completed all of my planned workouts this week.  I ran 3 times this week and hit the mat for yoga.  There was most certainly a morning or two where I considered snuggling in bed for an extra hour but like they always say, you never regret a workout!  Today, I’m most certainly enjoying a rest day and I won’t feel one bit bad about it.  Accomplished.

And this weekend?  A much bigger accomplishment.  I’ll become a certified yoga instructor!  It’s been quite the 6 months trying to get through each weekend, prepare for exams and prep for our community class but it’s also been such a fun journey! There have been so many mini milestones to this journey like conquering challenging poses, finding myself as a teacher, learning to be a little less Type A, and teaching my first class.  If you are in the Boston area I hope you’ll come out to South Boston Yoga to  share this accomplishment with me! I’ll be teaching a community class with my fellow trainees on Sunday at 2pm.  We’ll be teaching an awesome all levels flow with a rockin’ playlist!

FSFC_FINAL

What leaves you feeling accomplished?